How is a Military Divorce Different from a Civilian Divorce? – ChooseGoldman.com


A Guide to Military Divorce: Divorce can be a hard time for a family. When one spouse is in the military, the divorce process has special rules. It is very important to know about these rules for a fair divorce.

What Makes a Military Divorce Different?

Special Laws and Rules: A military divorce uses the same state laws as a regular divorce. But it also has federal laws and military rules. These rules affect where you can file for divorce and how military pay is shared.

How Service Affects Things: A person’s military job can change the divorce process. If they are sent to a new place, the divorce might have to pause. Knowing this helps you plan for what will happen.

  • Federal Laws: These are laws for the whole country for people in the service.
  • State Laws: Each state has its own laws for divorce that you must follow.
  • Military Rules: The Army, Navy, and Air Force also have their own rules.
  • Where the Soldier Lives: You can file for divorce in the service member’s home state.
  • Where the Spouse Lives: You can also file in the state where the other spouse lives.
  • Where They are Stationed: The state where the service member works is another choice.

Here is an example. A soldier is based in Texas. His home state is Florida. His wife lives in Michigan. They can choose which of these three states is the best place to file for their divorce.

Can You Get Divorced During Active Duty?

Yes, Divorce is an Option: You can file for divorce even if your spouse is on active duty. They can even be in a combat zone. It might be a little harder to do, but it is still possible.

Giving the Divorce Papers: The service member must be given the divorce papers. This is called “serving.” Serving papers to someone on a military base can be hard and may need help from the military.

  • File with the Court: The first step is filing the divorce papers in court.
  • Serve the Papers: The service member must get a copy of the papers.
  • Wait for an Answer: The service member is given time to answer the papers.
  • Ask for Help: The base commander can sometimes help you serve the papers.
  • Use a Process Server: You can hire someone who knows how to serve papers on a base.
  • Send Through Mail: Sometimes, legal mail through the military can be used.

Let’s say Jane’s husband is on a ship for the Navy. Jane wants a divorce. Her lawyer works with the Navy. They make sure her husband gets the divorce papers, and the case can start.

What Law Protects Soldiers in a Divorce?

A Law Called the SCRA: There is a special law for service members. It is called the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act, or SCRA. This law helps them focus on their job without being hurt by a court case at home. A lawyer who knows about military divorce can explain this law.

How the Law Pauses a Case: The SCRA lets a service member ask a judge to pause the divorce. This pause is called a “stay.” It gives the service member more time to deal with the divorce when they are not on duty.

  • Delays the Case: The SCRA can push back court dates.
  • Must Ask the Judge: The service member has to show their job stops them from being in court.
  • Not a Full Stop: The judge must approve the request to pause the case.
  • First Pause is 90 Days: The first pause is almost always for 90 days.
  • More Time is an Option: The judge can add more time if needed for the military duty.
  • It Does Not End the Divorce: The law only delays the divorce. It does not make it go away.

An example is if Bill is sent to another country. His wife files for divorce. Bill’s lawyer uses the SCRA to pause the case. This means Bill can take part in the divorce when he gets back home.

How Is a Military Pension Shared?

Rules for Retirement Pay: A military pension is a big part of a divorce. It is not like a normal retirement plan. A federal law tells the states how this money can be shared with an ex-spouse.

About the 10/10 Rule: You may hear of a “10/10 Rule.” This rule is only about how the money is paid. It means the marriage lasted 10 years. And the military service also lasted 10 years during the marriage. This affects who sends the check.

  • It is Marital Property: The part of the pension earned while married can be shared.
  • The Judge Decides: The judge in the state court will decide how much each person gets.
  • A Math Formula is Used: The court uses a formula with years of marriage and years of service.
  • Direct Pay: The 10/10 rule lets the government pay the ex-spouse their share directly.
  • Not a Rule to Get Paid: You can still get part of the pension if you do not meet this rule.
  • How You Get Paid: If you don’t meet the rule, the service member pays the ex-spouse themselves.

For example, Sue and Rob were married for 12 years. Rob was in the Army for all 12 of those years. They meet the 10/10 rule. The court tells the Army to send Sue her part of Rob’s pension each month.

What About Kids When a Parent is Deployed?

Changes to Child Support: A deployment changes family life. The amount of child support may need to change for a short time. This is because a parent’s pay might be different when they are away.

Making a Parenting Plan: A parenting plan for a military family must be easy to change. The plan should say what happens when a parent is sent away. It can even let a grandparent see the kids for the deployed parent.

  • New Support Orders: A judge can make a new child support order just for the time of deployment.
  • Pay Can Change: The amount can go up or down based on the parent’s deployment pay.
  • Goes Back to Normal: The old child support amount starts again when the parent comes home.
  • Stay in Touch: A good plan should include phone calls and video chats.
  • Family Visits: The plan can let other family members, like grandparents, visit the kids.
  • Easy to Change Back: The plan should let the parent see their kids as soon as they get home.

When Mike was deployed, his child support payment went down for a little while. His parents were able to visit his kids on weekends. When Mike came home, his old plan and payment started again.

What About Base Housing and Health Care?

Moving Out of Base Housing: Many military families live on a military base. After a divorce, the ex-spouse and kids will have to move out. They usually have about 30 days to find a new place to live.

Health Care is a Big Deal: Military health care is called TRICARE. An ex-spouse will usually lose this health care after a divorce. Some can keep it if they meet a “20/20/20 Rule.” To learn more, this Overview of Military Divorce is helpful.

  • 30-Day Rule: The family has about one month to move out of base housing.
  • New Housing Money: The service member will get money to help pay for a new home off base.
  • Support for Housing: The cost of a new home can be part of spousal support talks.
  • The 20/20/20 Rule: This means a 20-year marriage, 20 years of service, and a 20-year overlap.
  • Short-Term Health Care: Some ex-spouses can buy health care for a short time after the divorce.
  • Kids Stay Covered: The children will still be covered by TRICARE after the divorce.

After their divorce, Amy and her kids had to move out of their house on the Army base. The judge knew she had to pay for a new home. This was part of his decision on how much support she would get.

What if We Live in Different States?

A Common Problem: Military families often move. It is very common for a husband and wife to live in different states. This makes it tricky to know where to file for divorce. You must pick a state that has power over your case.

Get the Right Help: You need a lawyer who knows the rules for these cases. They can help you pick the best state to file your papers. Some states have laws that are better for the service member, and some are better for the other spouse. Help from Out-of-state Military Divorce Attorneys in Michigan is key.

  • Home State: This is the state the service member calls their permanent home.
  • Current State: This is the state where either the husband or wife lives now.
  • Duty Station State: This is the state where the service member is working.
  • Pension Laws: States have different rules for how they split pensions.
  • Spousal Support Laws: The rules for spousal support can be very different in each state.
  • How Fast it Takes: Some states have a much faster divorce process than others.

A husband was in the Navy in California. His wife moved to Michigan. Her lawyer in Michigan helped her file there. The Michigan laws were better for her side of the case.

Why Do I Need a Lawyer Who Knows Military Divorce?

The Rules are Hard: A military divorce has many extra rules. A lawyer who does not know them can make big mistakes. They might not know about the SCRA or military pensions. This can hurt you for years to come.

Experience is Key: A law firm that handles military divorces knows what to do. They know the special words and the right papers to file. Their help protects you and makes sure the divorce is fair. You can learn How Does a Military Divorce Work from lawyers who know the rules.

  • They Know Federal Laws: They know the special laws that protect service members.
  • They Know Military Pay: They know how to read military pay stubs to find all the money.
  • They Work with the Military: They know who to call to get the right papers and information.
  • Protect Your Money: They make sure you get your fair share of the pension.
  • Help with the Kids: They make parenting plans that work for military life and moving.
  • Follow All the Rules: They guide you through all the steps to make it less stressful.

A woman hired a lawyer who did not know about military divorce. The lawyer forgot to include her share of her husband’s pension in the final papers. She had to hire a new Michigan Divorce Attorney to fix this very big mistake.

Extra Insights

A Savings Plan Called TSP: The military has a savings plan called the Thrift Savings Plan, or TSP. It is like a 401(k) plan. The money put into the TSP while you were married can be split in the divorce. A special court order is needed to do this.

About Disability Pay: Sometimes a service member gets disability pay. This money is for an injury from their time in the service. This pay cannot be split in a divorce. This can sometimes lower the amount of pension an ex-spouse gets.

Frequently Asked Questions About Military Divorce

1. Can a soldier just ignore divorce papers?
No, they cannot. A special law lets them delay the case, but they still have to answer the court.

2. Does it matter where we file for divorce?
Yes, the state you choose is very important. Each state has different laws about property and money.

3. What is a TSP?
A TSP is a retirement savings account. A pension is a monthly check you get after you retire.

4. Will I still have my military ID card after a divorce?
No, you will lose your military ID card and base access. There is an exception if you meet the 20/20/20 rule.

5. Is spousal support different for the military?
The military has its own rules for support while you are separated. But the final support amount is set by a judge.

6. Can a military parent not pay child support?
No, they must pay. If they do not, the money can be taken right from their military pay.

7. How long will a military divorce take?
It can take more time than other divorces. This is because deployments or getting records can cause delays.

8. Do I need my spouse to agree to a divorce?
No, you do not. You can file for divorce even if your spouse does not want to get one.

9. Can the military give me a free lawyer?
Yes, the military has lawyers on base called JAG officers. But they cannot go to a state court to represent you.

10. What is a Survivor Benefit Plan (SBP)?
The SBP is like life insurance for the pension. A judge can order the service member to give this to their ex-spouse.

11. Can we change our parenting plan later?
Yes, you can change the plan if there is a big change in your life. A move or a new deployment can be a reason to change it.

12. Can my ex-spouse get my GI Bill?
No, school benefits like the GI Bill cannot be split in a divorce. But a service member can choose to give them to a child.

A military divorce has many moving parts. You can learn more by watching our video on military and civilian divorces. If this is your situation, you need a team that knows all the rules.

If you have questions, we are here to help you. We have worked with many military families. We can protect you and your family. Please reach out to us for help.

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