Grandparents have special bonds with grandchildren and oftentimes have no problem asking children to go with them. It can be disturbing if grandparents take children without parental consent. Parents can take action and in doing so affect so many lives, most specially children’s.
Click here to watch the video on Initiating A Custody Case When A Grandparent Fled Michigan With The Child
Authorities receive about a quarter of a million reports of kidnapping occurrences each year. Numerous of these are brief, minor occurrences frequently including misconceptions or disputes over custody.
Half of all reported abductions in the United States involve family members. When compared to other kidnapping offenses, family abduction often involves parents and has a much higher proportion of female perpetrators.
Family abductions, which most typically target children under the age of 6, frequently take place in the midst of contentious divorces or child custody disputes between parents.
However, some parental abductions can go on for a long time and affect both the children and the parents from whose care the child was taken unlawfully. Children who are transported from the United States to foreign countries, where American laws and even international agreements are ineffective or challenging to implement, are the most challenging situations of this kind.
Since the child might be reluctant to leave the abductor and other family members might be complicit in covering up and supporting the abducting parent, family abductions provide special challenges for law enforcement.
A missing or abducted child frequently has physical or mental impairments, which can make it more challenging to locate and return the youngster. A child with developmental disabilities could find it challenging to express their wants, identity, or address to others. The youngster may be in more danger as a result of this.
These kids are especially prone to kidnapping, and if they become missing it could be more difficult to find them and get them back to their parents.
Physical impairments can also make it more challenging to find missing children, bring them home, and offer the essential medical attention and treatment. Special training is provided to law enforcement organizations in managing instances involving missing or abducted children who have physical or mental problems.
So it is no wonder, the concern about children being taken by grandparents are a specially delicate matter to discuss in child custody cases.
Let’s try to put things in perspective. Yes, taking custody of a child without the parents consent can be bad. By legal definition it is, and ordinarily it is very disturbing to the parents who will have to worry about their children’s safety and well-being.
But we also need to see this from the grandparents perspective. We have to get in the context of a grandparent who desires to have some time with their grandchildren. They may actually have been dreaming of having them even before their parents did.
The Awesome & Powerful Role Grandparents Play In Uplifting Lives
More than 70% of grandparents who participated in a survey sponsored by the American Association of Retired Persons or AARP, said they valued becoming grandparents. Many people reported that staying in touch with their grandchildren provided the necessary psychological and emotional support.
It can be difficult to be cut off from the happiness brought on by a bond with a grandchild.
According to research, 43% of grandparents claim they travel more than 200 miles to visit the grandchild who is closest to them. Travel time is not the only difficulty in participating in a grandchild’s life. Conflicts within families, rivalries, and even religious differences can have an effect.
Imagine that distance just to see a grandchild. Can you imagine anyone else in your life who will go literally the distance?
Grandparents have a profound impact on young children’s development. Such an impact differs from that of a parent-child relationship, so it is crucial to promote this bond in ways both accessible and secure for everyone involved.
Grandparents are not simply a source of knowledge for young children; they also frequently impart enduring family customs and aid in forming ideas of positive family relations.
It has become crucial for grandparents to consult their adult children and be aware of their parenting philosophies as things change in our world. The connection between grandparents and parents should include communication and respect. But keep in mind that some things will never alter, such as the significance of grandparents and their love for their grandkids.
Now Imagine this. Get into the shoes of your parents who are separated from their grandkids all of a sudden. One weekend, and they’re gone.
Your grown children relocate several miles away. With the wife of your son, you disagree. Your daughter doesn’t appreciate your advice on how to rear her kids. Whatever the circumstances, the grandparents suddenly find themselves cut off from their grandchildren’s lives and dealing with all the associated emotions.
Estrangement Can Bring Grandparents To Their Absolutely Lowest Being
Imagine a situation either forbids grandparents from seeing or speaking to their grandchildren, or forbids grandchildren from doing so.
In addition, there is a great deal of despair, rage, hurt, heartache, loneliness, and isolation by the distance drawing the grandparents and grandchildren apart.
Grandparent estrangement can result from physical, mental, and emotional separation from grandkids.
Separation from grandchildren can occur accidentally, for example, if they live far away and it is difficult or expensive for them to visit there.
Other instances, which can be even more painful for grandparents, is when parents make the conscious decision to keep their child away from one or more grandparents.
Whatever the reasons, separations frequently result in a rift between all parties. This uncommon experience of grandparents is referred to as estrangement.
Grandparent estrangement can result from physical, mental, and emotional separation from grandkids. Grandparent estrangement is a circumstance in which grandparents are forbidden from seeing or spending time with their grandchildren.
Grandparents experience a sense of loss arising when relationships deteriorate in a grandparent’s life. Grief commonly accompanies this sense of loss. The grief felt is associated with the loss of the future and the excitement imagined with a grandchild.
So grandparents have this estrangement going on in their lives. Then they hear things about their grandchildren.
They hear things like:
Your marriage isn’t going well. Divorce is coming up in the conversation.
You’re actually divorce and the grandparent starts worrying about who the kids are with at the moment.
You died in a freak road accident and nobody’s telling anybody what happened.
You have legal custody of their grandchild while the other siblings are with your spouse (the spouse they hate).
Or, you aren’t taking care of their grandchildren and you’re starting to be an alcoholic or drug addict or something even worse.
Or they just remembered they really hate you and they don’t want their grandchildren to grow up just like you.
And guess what, they start thinking of taking matters into their own hands. Yes, like literally taking your kids in their hands and taking them somewhere far from Michigan. And they didn’t call. They didn’t text. Didn’t message you on Facebook.
They’re just gone with the kids. What are you going to do?
You’re Going To Hate Yourself For These Colossal Thing
Now what will a concerned parent do? Naturally you’re calling your parents if you suspect it’s them who took your kids.
Then you’ll call the police. If you already have pre-existing custody issues with your parents, you will be calling your lawyer.
It’s about to turn colossal for everyone. It’s a life changing moment for all.
It’s colossal for you because you just reclassified your parents to Super Kidnapper Grandparents. They’re making it to the morning or evening news depending on what state lines they cross. If you’re feeling guilty, then it just made it even more colossal for you.
It’s colossal for them because they’re now fugitives being chased by every law enforcement officer in every jurisdiction. Just imagine them in cuffs trudging to court in brightly colored uniforms escorted by police.
It’s colossal for your kids who will see their grandparents’ faces plastered in every news just after the advertisement on children’s morning cereals. Or, probably in the morning cereal box itself.
Once this is out, we’re really not talking about a custody case against grandparents. We’re talking about kidnapping. The other side of the scale is interference. The minimum charges will be interference with child custody. Do you know it is actually a crime in Michigan?
Grandparents could get jail sentences for this.
A minor’s adoptive or biological parent is prohibited by state law from removing or keeping custody of the child from a custodial parent or guardian. Three essential components make up interfering with child custody.
- The duration of time must be longer than 24 hours;
- There must be a desire to keep the kid away from the parent with custody; and
- There must be a valid court order governing custody or parenting time rights.
Officially, interference is defined as any action that contravenes a custody and visitation order as well as state legislation. A 24-hour detention term isn’t the sole consideration, though.
For instance, it may be considered an interference with child custody arrangements and lead to civil enforcement if your spouse regularly drops off or picks up your child beyond a set hour on a school night. Any action that prevents you from spending time with your child can be illegal or a breach of a court order.
Remember, this is your parents we’re talking about here. Or, your spouse’s parents. The grandparents of your kids. If parents can be accused of interference how much more grandparents.
If you hate your parents or your spouses. It may be satisfying on your part to see them walking in cuffs and chains. But if you love them just as much as any kid would love their grandparents, you’re in a really bad place.
You’re going to hate yourself.
Initiating a custody case against grandparents may not really be a thing. For one, you will most likely not see your parents having custody of your kids. Grandparents don’t exactly have much grounds for taking custody of their grandkids. Even with the very narrow window the law provides, it is very hard to invoke even with cause.
Under the law grandparents do actually have certain rights in terms of having access to your kids. It’s called grandparenting time.
There Is Limited and Uncommonly Thing As Grandparenting Time
If you are going through a divorce with your spouse and have concerns about grandparents’ rights in relation to custody disputes or you are a grandparent yourself and are worried about how and when you will be able to see your grandchildren, it is important to understand grandparents’ rights in Michigan child custody cases.
However, anyone interested in a child custody battle should be aware that grandparents do not have the same legal powers as parents.
Grandparenting Time
In some circumstances, a grandmother may be permitted to request visitation (also known as grandparenting time) under Michigan law.
In cases involving child custody, Michigan courts now refer to parental rights and opportunities for time with children as “parenting time” rather than “visitation.”
Similar to other states, Michigan’s grandparents’ rights allow a child’s grandparent to ask for “grandparenting time” if one or more of the following legal requirements hold true:
- The parents are involved in a divorce, separate maintenance, or annulment proceeding.
- Parents may already be divorced, their marriage may have been dissolved, or they may be living apart due to a different maintenance order.
- The grandmother is the child’s deceased parent’s parent, and one of the child’s parents has passed away.
- Paternity has been established despite the fact that the parents are not now cohabitating and were never wed.
- Paternity has been established despite the fact that the parents are not now cohabitating and were never wed.
- The child does not reside with one of the parents and has legal custody of someone other than the child’s parent(s).
- The grandparent who is requesting visitation or grandparenting time “developed an established custodial environment for the kid” the year before.
Grandparent Time Levels
If grandparents are allowed to visit, the type of visitation they receive will depend on things like:
- Preferences of the child
- Emotional connections and affection between the grandparent and the child
- Grandparents’ influence on a child’s life
- The nature and duration of a grandparent-grandchild connection
- The grandparent’s physical and mental well-being
- Negative interactions between grandparents and parents
- A background of abuse
- Grandparent’s moral standing
- Grandparents’ readiness to promote a positive child-parent relationship
This is the reason why it is highly unlikely a parent is going to get into a custody case with their own parents for the grandkids. It is already too taxing for a grandparent to get grandparenting time, so child custody is really too high a level for them to pursue.
Useful Advice So You Never Get To The Colossal Thing
Your parents, the grandparents of your kids may have been compelled to take your child. They could have their reasons. Some of those reasons may be you or your spouse. You may be ignoring the role of your parents in your children’s lives.
There’s a way so you never get to be in that place, of making a colossal decision altering so many lives.
Take a look at your goals. Discuss your expectations for your parents’ or your spouse’s parents’ involvement in your child’s life in advance. Include your in-laws if you have to, and there could be a lot of them right there.
Grandparents may have expectations regarding how much time they’ll spend with the grandchildren. These expectations may not coincide with those of the new parents. Get your points across clearly before the baby arrives to prevent tedious and embarrassing arguments later on.
Maintain regular contact with your parents.
New grandparents may become anxious if they don’t understand what’s happening. Keep in mind that they are just as concerned about the new family member as you are. Inform them about their new grandchild when you call them frequently.
If unannounced grandpa visits make you anxious or uncomfortable, get your dad a cell phone so he won’t have an excuse not to call. Teach the new grandma how to use Skype or Facebook Messenger. She may watch the baby’s adorable face and coo and babble all she wants since it’s free!
Be adaptable. If you can’t slightly bend the rules while being a nana, where is the pleasure in that? Try not to overreact if you forbid sweets and subsequently learn that granny occasionally sneaks your child a biscuit.
Find a middle ground because, as you know, your parents’ been waiting for a grandchild to spoil. And may have for a time now. Your mom will get to treat your child while avoiding a significant sugar high and subsequent collapse if you compromise with strawberries dipped in a little sugar.
Although they could have different views on parenting, your parents still care about and want the best for their grandchild.
New parents need to go above and beyond to express their gratitude to their own parents. Show your appreciation if your parents instruct you on anything helpful. When you admit that your parents are correct, they are considerably less likely to be critical of you.
Establish limits. Good grandparents have clear boundaries. Prior to establishing any house rules, discuss expectations. Create some specific instructions and be sure to convey them in a positive way if there is opposition to these strict house rules.
Your parents have likely been there and will accept your wishes; alone time is essential for establishing new family ties.
We constantly hear this as new parents. We rarely understand how hard our own parents had to work until we have children of our own. Your entire family can come closer together when there is recognition and respect for one another.
If ever, you have to disagree with your parents, and legal action must be taken, hopefully it will be the last resort. Talk to your lawyer before taking on these challenges on your own.
Consequences may not be reversible so take a course of action under the advice of your lawyer.
You really need a lawyer who not only gives you the technical wisdom to get you through but also believes in taking care of family within the bounds of family law.
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Goldman & Associates Law Firm is here to with information about Child Custody and Divorce in the State of Michigan.