When launching a custody dispute, is there a custody arrangement you should be on the lookout for? What would constitute a successful scenario? People tend to rely on what they are told. Primary custody may belong to one parent. Weekends are alternated with the other parent. One night every seven days. Typically, Friday nights and Sunday nights are the alternate weekends. The other parent gets 22 overnights each month compared to 8 for the primary parent. Is that fair? You may reconsider. Is there an ideal custody arrangement I should seek?
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It’s important to choose an option that both parents can understand. The arrangement cannot make it difficult to adjust to the new circumstances. What is best for the custodial parent or the primary parent is irrelevant. What suits the child’s best interests is what matters. We know every family is different. It’s a natural consequence of unique individuals coming together as a unit. Coming up with a parenting schedule would mean some will work. Some may not at all. Younger children may want more time with their parents. As children grow older they will manifest a preference for one parent over the other.
What are the possible custody arrangements?
A custody arrangement should include a parenting plan. The best choices were those made with the children’s best interests in mind. Having that in mind enables you to negotiate the intricate world of custody arrangements. Every family is different. Determining custody schedules can be challenging.
Joint physical custody.
This is a custody arrangement in which the child spends roughly equal amounts of time living with each parent. This is often the preferred arrangement for parents who want to maintain a close relationship with their children after divorce. Joint physical custody requires parents to be willing to cooperate and communicate. There are a few different ways to structure joint physical custody. Using full weeks for custody schedules. Use full weeks when children are younger. When parents don’t live close enough to one another to allow for frequent transfers. These full-week custody arrangements should be taken into account.
- Alternating Weeks. Also referred to as “week on, week off.” This type of custody agreement sees kids spend a full week with one parent before going to the other for a full week. Parents can decide, for instance, what day Sunday through Saturday begins and ends. They can decide as well what time the children are transferred to the other parent. Many midweek moves are prevented by this custody arrangement.
- Two Weeks Each. Children do not alternate between the custodial parents every other week. Children stay with them for two weeks at a period. The two-week intervals might be too long for some younger children. They reduce the number of times children must transfer from one place to another. Some parents would only put in place this strategy during the summer. It makes vacationing more convenient.
- Using midweek transfers in custody schedules. A week without one parent can be too lengthy for kids. Breaking up the week under these circumstances is an excellent idea. These arrangements share custody equally over the course of two weeks, so you should be aware of that. The first week will see one parent working more days, while the second week will see the other parent working more days. At the end of the two-week period, however, the overall number of custody days for each parent is equal. There are several methods for equitably dividing the weeks. These figures represent the number of days that each parent will have. Parent One has 3 days, followed by Parent Two’s 4 days, Parent One’s 4 days, and Parent Two’s 3 days, according to the formula 3-4-4-3. The timetables are then reset.
- Holiday custody schedules. There are several choices for dividing the holiday time a child spends with each parent. Such are available in the suggested parenting time plans provided by Macomb County. The recommendations suggest that parents divide up the following eight well-known holidays. A child spends Mother’s Day weekend with the mother and Father’s Day weekend with the father. Each year, four of the eight holidays, which alternate, should be used by both parents to spend time with their children. The child spends Labor Day, Christmas Eve, Memorial Day, and Easter Sunday with their father. Then, they will all celebrate the Fourth of July, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas with their mother.
Joint legal custody.
The legal authority for decisions about a child’s upbringing belongs to both parents. Education decisions are made by parents. They also decide on matters of religion and health care. They are free to decide on these issues unless the court says otherwise. There are situations where the parents don’t get along well. They disagree on the best way to bring up their child. One parent may be given sole legal custody by the court in these cases.
Primary physical custody.
The child lives with one parent most of the time, but the other parent has regular visitation. This is often the preferred arrangement for parents who have different work schedules. An arrangement for parents who live in different locations. Primary physical custody can be challenging. It is difficult for the non-custodial parent to maintain a close relationship with the child.
Sole physical custody.
The child lives with one parent most of the time. The other parent has visitation only on certain days or weekends. It is often the preferred arrangement for parents who have poor relationships. For parents who cannot agree on how to raise their children. Sole physical custody can be difficult for the non-custodial parent.
A successful custody arrangement must be flexible. Children can experience less loneliness if their non-custodial parent is in regular phone or video chat contact with them. Give the children’s needs top priority. Watch how they react to absences and then adjust the schedule as necessary. Keep an eye on your children. Check if the custody arrangement is really working out for them.
What do you need to consider when deciding the custody arrangement?
You’re in the middle of the divorce process. Your lawyer has given you already the rundown of matters that need focus. Children come front and center. Legal and physical arrangements have to be made. The initial meetings with your lawyer should give you an idea of what’s coming. You need to consider custody arrangements very soon. Know the factors relevant to getting custody.
The child’s age and needs.
You’re trying to figure out the best custody arrangements. Think of the child’s age. Check their needs at their age level. Read about them. You’ll learn young children need more stability. Your older children are better able to handle changes. Parents have more access to understanding their children compared to 30 years ago. Consider where they are in their age of development.
- Toddlers. Toddlers are still developing their sense of attachment. They may need more time with their primary caregiver. That may be you. They are more likely to be more resistant to change. Be sensitive to their needs when making changes to their custody arrangement.
- Preschoolers. You’ll start to notice that streak of independence at this age. Things will start to become hectic with independence. Preschoolers are adaptable to change. They still need a lot of stability and routine though. So it is important to find a custody arrangement that provides them with both.
- School-aged children. Children at school are frequently more flexible to change. They are capable of spending more time with each of their parents. They might even like the change of scenery. Be aware of their needs. Ascertain that they follow a constant routine.
- Teenagers. Teenagers are more independent. They prefer to spend more time with their friends. Have their own activities rather than with their parents. Even with that they still need a strong relationship with their parents. They should have a say in their custody arrangement.
The parents’ work schedules.
A lot of families have both parents working full-time. Parenting schedules can be difficult to juggle. They may need to consider a joint custody arrangement. They can try a primary physical custody arrangement with regular visitation. Most often this will depend on the parent’s work schedules. Both parents may be working from home. They may be able to co-parent better. They have a more flexible custody arrangement. Things to consider when thinking about the parents’ work schedules in the context of custody arrangements:
- The hours that each parent works. One parent is capable of working long hours. A parent will not be able to spend as much time as the other parent with the child. They need primary physical custody of the other parent.
- The flexibility of the parents’ work schedules. Parents’ work schedules are flexible. They may be able to work around each other’s schedules. It will ensure that the child has regular contact with both parents. This could lead to a joint custody arrangement.
- The distance between the parents’ work and home locations. Some careers demand that the parents work in different cities or states. This could make it difficult for them to co-parent. This could lead to a primary physical custody arrangement with one parent.
The parents’ relationship.
There can be rare occasions when spouses have the maturity to end a marriage without enmity. We’re talking about rare occasions. There’s always that residual pain in the initial realization that divorce is imminent. An amicable relationship after divorce can help in communication. It can help in talking about co-parenting. Discuss custody arrangements with respect for each other. Couples will be better able to co-parent even with separate households. A relationship gone sour after divorce is another thing. It will be difficult but not impossible to manage. Couples need to be flexible. Be willing to make changes to arrangements that best work for the children. Here are some things parents with poor relationships can do:
- Talk to your child. We can get caught up too much with the drama and we become oblivious to what’s happening to our child. Listen to your child about their wishes for custody. Hear their thoughts and feelings. This does not mean that you have to follow their wishes. They need to affirm their existence amidst this uncertainty.
- Consider the child’s developmental stage. We mentioned this a few paragraphs earlier. The child’s developmental stage should be a major consideration in any custody arrangement.
- Be flexible. Things can change. So should your custody arrangement. Be willing to make changes as needed to ensure that the arrangement is working for the child.
- Get help if needed. You are struggling to come to an agreement on custody. There are resources available to help you. You can talk to a mediator, a parenting coordinator, or an attorney.
The child’s wishes.
The child’s wishes should be considered. They are not the only factor that matters. The court will acknowledge the importance of the child’s wishes. The court still has to consider the other factors listed above. The law requires that the child’s wishes be taken into account. In Michigan, it is important if the child is of suitable age and maturity. The child should express an informed and fair preference. The child’s wishes will carry more weight if the child is older and more mature. The court will not always follow the wishes of the child. Even if the child is of suitable age and maturity. If the child’s wishes are not in their best interests, the court may refuse to grant them. Consider these about the child’s wishes in the context of custody arrangements:
- The age of the child. The older the child, the more weight their wishes will be given.
- The maturity of the child. The more mature the child, the more weight their wishes will be given.
- The child’s understanding of the situation. The court will want to know how well the child understands the situation. The child should be able to discern the implications of their wishes.
- The child’s relationship with each parent. The court will want to know how close the child is to each parent. How well each parent meets the child’s needs.
The parents’ history of violence or abuse.
A history of violence or abuse between the parents can be a significant element in custody. The court will consider whether there has been any physical or emotional abuse. Verify if there were threats of abuse or intimidation between the parents. The court will also consider whether the child has been exposed to any violence or abuse. The court is more likely to award sole custody to the parent who has not been abusive. The court would not want to place the child in a situation where they could be exposed to violence or abuse. The court may still award joint custody. The parents can co-parent effectively despite their history of violence or abuse. The child’s wishes and the child’s relationship are relevant in the determinations. While you’re reflecting on violence in the context of custody arrangements, consider these:
- The type of abuse. The court will want to know what type of abuse has occurred. How often does it has occurred? How severe has it been?
- The impact of the abuse on the child. The court will want to know how the abuse has affected the child, both physically and emotionally.
- The likelihood of the abuse recurring. The court will want to know whether there is a risk that the abuse will recur.
- The ability of the parents to co-parent. The court will want to know whether the parents can co-parent given their history of violence.
The child’s physical and emotional needs.
A special needs child may require a modified custody arrangement. A child with special needs may require proximity to a specific medical facility. They may require the assistance of a parent who can offer them specialized care. The court will consider their educational and emotional requirements. The ability of the parent to meet the needs of the child will also be considered by the court.
Is there an ideal custody arrangement?
Ideal suggests that both parties will accept the custody plan that is chosen. Every parent wants more time, not less. Sharing that time with the other parent is something that some individuals would never even consider. That won’t be allowed by the courts. A lot of times throughout the year, your children are scheduled to visit your ex-spouse. You’d want to hang out with them. The divorce procedure necessitates negotiations. You can construct a suitable parenting time arrangement or plan with the help of a Michigan child custody attorney. The strategy must be carried out once it has been established. For the welfare of your children, consistency is paramount. They will be just as reliant on this strategy as you are. They can better manage their everyday lives if they are aware of where they will be and who they will be with each week. As much time as possible should be spent with them. A standard parenting time schedule exists in Michigan. To be fair and prevent disputes, many ex-spouses adhere to them. There is flexibility in how you share the time with children.
Even if you may have the ideal timetable and organization in mind, sticking to the guidelines may be necessary to get things off to a good start. Michigan has come up with some sort of standard for the arrangements. Taxpayer money, time, and effort were all invested in it. It might be better to just give it a shot before trying out anything innovative first.
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