This summer, you have to be a parent to your children. Summer is great in Michigan. You have parenting time. Your ex-spouse scheduled other events around the children’s schedules. They are no longer available during your parenting time. The children’s schedule became hectic. Your ex-spouse is preventing you from visiting them over the summer. Your co-parent is usurping your parenting time. What do you do? Your ex is denying summer visitation due to busy schedules.
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Take a look at the custody arrangement. Verify the details of the order. Contact your ex-spouse. Request your spouse to plan the activity at a different time. Your children will be available for you to spend time with them as a result. If none of this succeeds, submit a motion to reclaim your parenting time. By taking your parenting time, your ex-spouse shouldn’t be able to marginalize you.
What do you understand about parenting time?
Very few people know about this. Michigan formed a task force in February 2012. The Michigan Court Improvement Program or CIP activated this task force. The CIP was a program under the State Court Administrative Office. The task force was set in collaboration with the Michigan Department of Human Services or DHS. The collaboration formed a statewide multidisciplinary task force. The focus was the improvement of frequency and quality of parent-child visitation. The task force filed a report in 2013. They wrote a report about the rules and practices. The report focuses on keeping parents connected with their children. Frequent visitation has long been lauded by researchers. It is an integral component of successful reunification. This is besides other secondary developmental benefits. It has been identified as a key factor in the continued physical and emotional growth of the child. Here are the other benefits of regular visitation on children:
- Better overall adjustment of the child.
- The child’s emotional well-being.
- The length of time in foster care.
- Increased gains in nonverbal intelligence quotient scores.
- More significant gains in emotional adjustment.
- Decreased internalized and externalized behavioral problems.
- Decreased number of placements.
Children who receive frequent visits from their biological parents experience fewer behavioral issues. Better than children who receive no visits at all. Many of the anxieties kids have while being placed might be reduced by visitation. It can reassure children that their parents are still alive and in good health and have not abandoned them. Children can feel less guilty about moving in with a new family if parents convince them that they do not oppose their placement there. Visitation will lessen the level of trauma experienced by all family members while also improving the short- and long-term outcomes for both children and their parents. Parental engagement in the case plan and success in reunification attempts will probably be encouraged by visitation.
What does it mean when a co-parent is usurping your parenting time?
When someone interferes with your parenting time, they are usurping it. Activities for children are scheduled during your parenting time by your co-parent. Your co-parent often does it without your permission. You can’t spend time with your children because of that. The parental time schedule is upset. It undermines the custody arrangements. Disagreements result from it.
Examples of co-parents usurping parenting time.
Scheduling Conflicts
Your co-parent schedules activities for children. Schedules it during your designated parenting time. Enroll the children in extracurricular activities. Take part in playdates or family gatherings overlapping with your scheduled time together.
Example:
It’s a weekend. A time to spend with your children. Your co-parent signs them up for a sports tournament. The tournament takes up the entire weekend. Leaves you with no time together as planned.
Impromptu Changes
A co-parent makes last-minute alterations to the parenting schedule. Does it without discussing it. Disrupts your planned parenting time. Your co-parent cancels. Postpone your scheduled time. Deprived you of the opportunity to be with your children as expected.
Example:
You arranged dinner. Planned an overnight stay with your children. Your co-parent informs you at the last minute they have made other plans for the children.
Denial of Access
This a severe case of usurping parenting time. A co-parent prevents you from exercising parenting time altogether. Refuse to allow you to spend time with your children. This is despite the custody order. Despite the visitation agreement in place.
Example:
You arrive to pick up your children. It’s a scheduled visitation. Your co-parent doesn’t give the children. The co-parent cites various reasons. You end up with no parenting time.
We mentioned a few instances where a co-parent usurps your parenting time. Depending on the situation, a co-parent may take different actions. Usurping parenting time implies going outside the established schedule. Denying you the opportunity to spend time with your children.
What will be the impact of a co-parent usurping parenting time on children?
Usurping a co-parent’s parenting time has adverse psychological effects on the child. A parent may be too engrossed making life inconvenient for a co-parent. They become oblivious to what they are doing to their children. Here’s what it can mean for them:
Less Time Together
Time with children is lost when parenting time is denied. Important moments are missed by a parent. Children miss having fun with games. Miss going on adventures. They miss out on socializing and talking. You’re annoyed. Your children are dejected.
Emotional Distress
Different things could be felt by children. They go through grief, perplexity, and occasionally wrath. This is an indication of mental anguish. It takes many different forms. It manifests as mood changes. It shows either an increase in anger or withdrawal.
Strained Parent-Child Relationships
Usurping parenting time ruins the relationship between child and parent. It hits the child like a sense of loss. The loss of opportunities for bonding. It diminishes the chance to create meaningful memories. It impacts the child’s sense of security. They lose trust and attachment.
Disrupted Sense of Stability
Children enjoy stability. They favor consistency. Interfering with their time with the non-custodial parent upsets their sense of stability. It can lead to feelings of doubt and insecurity. This interruption may have an effect on their general well-being. Increase their worry. Give them a sensation their lives are in a state of instability.
Identity Confusion
Spending time with parents shapes a child’s sense of identity. The sense of belonging. Children may struggle with questions about their own identity. Where do they fit within the family? They start to doubt their importance to both parents. This can create confusion. It impacts their self-esteem. Undermines their self-concept.
Long-term Emotional Impact
A consistent pattern of usurping parenting time has repercussions. It affects the emotional well-being of children in the long term. They will suffer issues in controlling feelings. Struggle in navigating relationships in the future. Losing parenting time will create a void in a child’s life. It takes a toll on their emotional health.
Parents must look after the needs of their children above personal conflicts. Seek professional support. Join family therapy or counseling. Addressing the impact of usurped parenting time can mitigate emotional issues later. Learn strategies to promote healthy co-parenting dynamics. Every child and family is unique. The specific impact of usurping parenting time can vary. A child therapist can provide specialized support. They can help children process their emotions. Help them cope with the situation. Foster healthy relationships with both parents.
What are the consequences when a co-parent usurps the parenting time of the other parent?
The State of Michigan’s custody and parenting time laws must be followed. It guarantees both parents have the chance to spend time with their children. It preserves the fair and equitable relationship of parents with their children. Co-parents must adhere to the timetable they have mutually decided upon. There may be legal repercussions. One co-parent might try to restrict. Interfere with the other parent’s parenting time. Read on to learn the legal ramifications of usurping parenting time.
Custody and Visitation
In Michigan, parents follow the court’s decision through custody and parenting time arrangements. These arrangements are embodied in custody and parenting time orders. Courts frown on parents disobeying custody and parenting time orders. They have a system in place to cite erring parents who challenge the leniency of the court. Challenging the custody and parenting time orders carries penalties.
Enforcing Parenting Time
Your parenting time is being infringed. File an action in court. Request the judge to uphold the custody order. Enforce the visitation agreement. Ask the court to have your co-parent respect the parenting time order. Ensure the children get regular parenting time. Establish meaningful contact with both parents. The court will examine the situation. It may alter the order. The court may impose sanctions on the co-parent usurping the parenting time.
Penalties and Legal Action
A co-parent may disregard the custody arrangements. Usurp parenting time. A parent can do that at their own risk. They may face legal consequences. The court can hold them in contempt. They have disobeyed a court order. The court can impose penalties. Penalties can come in the form of fines and community service. In worst cases, even jail time. The severity of the penalties depends on the circumstances. It depends on the judge’s decision.
There are consequences for usurping parenting time. Parents must adhere to court-ordered custody and visitation arrangements. You can try to usurp parenting time. Do it at your own peril. The affected parent has the right to seek legal recourse. Protect parental rights. The court may change the custody arrangement. Impose penalties on the co-parent who fails to follow the order. Parents must look after the best interests of their children. Be fair to a co-parent and children. Have a balanced relationship with your children.
What can you do to regain and protect your parenting time?
You’re a parent. Your co-parent is denying you parenting time. There are actions you may take to reclaim it. Safeguard your time with your children. What you can do is this:
Communication
Discuss with your co-parent. Express your worries. Discuss the value of quality time with the children. Tell your co-parent about the advantages. Talk about your desire to be part of your children’s lives. Encourage courteous and honest dialogue. It might make them more receptive to your viewpoint.
Seek Mediation
Think about a mediator. A mediator is a third party who can assist you and your co-parent in reaching a settlement. A mediator hears both sides out. This expert aids in establishing common ground. They aid in identifying a just solution. Find a solution that satisfies the requirements of both parents and children.
Consult with a Lawyer
Communication is bad. Mediation can fail. It can be helpful to consult with a lawyer. A lawyer provides legal advice. Explain your rights. Guide you through the legal process. Help protect your rights as a parent. Ensure the custody agreement is followed.
Document Everything
Keep a record of instances your parenting time is interfered with. Document dates, times, and details of the incidents. This documentation can be valuable evidence. You will need to present your case in court. Get a compelling position during mediation.
You hear this from parents. “My children mean the world to me.” Parents mean the whole world to their children. It works both ways. It’s not a very complete life without the other parent. Why would a parent usurp the other parent’s time with children? It doesn’t make sense. Parents’ residual disappointments and frustrations can get the best of them. They lash out with lots of regret later. Keep the communications open. Talk more. Shout less. Listen to understand. Abide by the parenting time order.
What does it take to make parenting time work for you?
You’re divorced. You have children. Now, you have custody. You have a parenting time order. These aren’t arguments anymore. These are facts. The facts of your life as a co-parent. Here are some more facts. You will be a parent until your children turn 18. That goes for your ex-spouse too. You can’t get away from your ex-spouse. Not even with divorce. You’ll have to collaborate to survive the parenting side of your divorce. We have some tips to make it work (hopefully).
Communication is Key
Open talk. Honest communication. One of the keys to making parenting time work. Discuss the plan. Agree on a schedule. One that works for both of you. Plan one that benefits your children. Share information about your children’s activities. Check out school events together. Consult each other on health matters. It helps maintain a cooperative parenting relationship.
Be flexible
Flexibility is also a key to successful parenting time. Life isn’t made of well-planned schedules. You can’t factor in the weather. You can’t even factor in traffic. And, it’s man-made. Life will not always be predictable. Be flexible. Be willing to adapt to sudden changes in your life. Make reasonable adjustments if you can. Your own children will grow fast. That kind of change can be good or bad like the weather. Collaborating with your co-parent will make the challenges of change bearable.
Respect each other’s parenting time
Parenting time. It’s already a court order. Might as well follow it. Following it means having consistency in the children’s lives. It creates a structured routine. It is a framework of consistency. It has the added benefit of having quality time with children. A meaningful one if you try to see it that way.
Problem-solving and Conflict Resolution
There’s always going to be conflicts of some kind. An argument on many levels. It’s one of the perks of communicating. Treat it as a speedometer to tell you when to slow down. Approach any conflict with a problem-solving mindset. It makes you own the problem. You’ll look at your co-parent with more empathy. There’s always some professional who can help if you can’t solve it. Talk to your attorney. Your attorney always has someone in mind.
Seek Support and Guidance
Remember, you don’t have to navigate parenting time alone. Seek support from trusted individuals. You always have family members. Your friends will show up if you call. Your attorney can always help you with professionals. Any of them can provide guidance if you ask. Don’t be afraid to ask. Don’t be embarrassed to say you need help. Your children come first. Fear and embarrassment can take a back seat. Consulting with a family lawyer can help you understand your legal rights. Ensure your parenting time is protected under Michigan law.
Keep Your Children’s Best Interests in Mind
Like the courts always say, keep the children top of your mind. Consider your children’s emotional needs. Be keen on their education. Encourage a healthy relationship with your co-parent. Foster open communication with both parents and children. It helps create a supportive environment not just for you but for each other.
Making parenting time work requires effective communication, flexibility, and a focus on the best interests of your children. By maintaining open lines of communication with your co-parent, being flexible in scheduling, and prioritizing your children’s well-being, you can create a positive environment for them. Respecting the parenting time schedule and seeking assistance when conflicts arise are also essential steps in ensuring successful parenting time arrangements. Remember, you are not alone in this journey, and seeking guidance from professionals can help you navigate the complexities of parenting time with confidence.
There’s always a Michigan lawyer ready to help. If you doubt that, call us first.
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