Co-Parenting 101

What are the basics of co-parenting? Parenting might rank among the top reasons why marriages fail if you ask people. Co-parenting is almost impossible while married. Imagine the challenge of co-parenting after divorce. You will be living separate lives now. You all might have significant others. Include co-parenting in the mix.

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Because it is in the child’s best interest, we are co-parenting. You must cooperate and communicate. Keep in mind this when co-parenting. Simply because your co-parent does something differently does not imply that it is wrong. It’s a parenting style. You have a distinct approach to raising children. As a co-parent, you need to be treated with respect and compassion. Cooperation will be challenging without respect and empathy. You must conduct yourself honorably in this situation. You must feel for your co-parent. Approach co-parenting with compassion. Be child-centered. The best interests of the children must be served via co-parenting. You will co-parent until the children are adults, if not longer.

What is co-parenting and parenting time?

Co-parenting is when both parents actively take part in and work together. Collaborating on the upbringing of their children. The majority of divorce judgments and custody orders ask for some amount of co-parenting. This is except for extreme circumstances, such as domestic abuse. As a parent, you are involved in parenting time exchanges and child-related activities. You are involved as well in communication on doctor’s visits and parent-teacher conferences. Your involvement in other child-related matters is an example of co-parenting. This is having joint responsibility for making decisions for your children’s well-being. This is all about their development and connections with both parents.

Parents do not always share a residence. In Michigan, parenting time refers to the time a child spends with each parent. In Michigan, a child has the right to parenting time with both parents. It is mandated unless the court determines that doing so will endanger the child’s physical, mental, or emotional well-being. In general, a child should receive parenting time that is frequent, long, and of a nature that strengthens the link between parent and child.

Healthy co-parenting entails more than just a lack of disagreement. Children feel more comfortable and consistent. They feel supported when parents properly co-parent with one another. Children with good co-parenting relationships may also be better problem-solvers. These children are less prone to pit one parent against the other to get what they want. It lessens your susceptibility to being pitted against one another as parents.

Child-centric priorities.

Children’s needs and priorities are at the forefront of the discourse. This is the number one indicator of effective co-parenting. It is simpler to agree if you put your children’s needs ahead of your convenience. Your final decisions will also be more effectively geared toward meeting their requirements. 

Creating boundaries for co-parenting.

Healthy co-parenting is evident by what you don’t try to control, which is one telltale indicator of it. Parents often return to court on a post-judgment motion involving joint custody. It is often because one parent is dominating the other parent’s day-to-day decisions. It can be because one parent is excluded from crucial decisions. Decisions where communication and mutual agreement are required. Establish clear guidelines for what can and cannot be left up to your co-parent. Putting this on the table for discussion will help you prevent this. 

Making changes to parenting time.

The finest parenting time and custody agreements specify a timetable. It indicates when children will spend time with each parent. Your children will have consistency and predictability because of this. Healthy co-parents who share custody are willing to be adaptable. They’re willing to find solutions to these types of scheduling conflicts. Not every request for schedule changes is an effort to stifle the co-parent’s interaction with the child. These requests reflect the needs and experiences of the children. Oftentimes it involves make-up time for the absent parent. It might be a good idea to incorporate rules for schedule change requests. Include make-up parenting time in your decision-making process.

What is the best arrangement for parenting time?

People talk about how important it is for parents to have a regular holiday custody routine. When they do, they typically mean the Friend of the Court’s typical holiday schedule. State of Michigan rules on parenting time are in place. The situation in Macomb County and other Michigan counties is the same. The “best practices” described in these suggestions are generally relevant. When discussing parenting time and custody arrangements, the majority of parents see a weekly plan. Even parenting time schedule templates are created weekly. You can test out a few of these suggested schedules.

Custody schedules that use full weeks.

Weekly plans are beneficial for younger children. When parents don’t live close enough, weekly agreements are also a fantastic idea. Alternating Weeks: Also known as “week on, week off.” Children under this sort of custody arrangement spend a whole week with each parent. Before visiting the other for a full week the following time, one week must pass. For instance, parents can specify the start and end dates of Sunday through Saturday. Using this, you can decide when to deliver the children to the other parent as well. With this custody agreement, many midweek moves are avoided. Instead of shifting children every other week, the custodial parents have them for two weeks at a time. Some young toddlers could find a two-week break to be too long. They do shorten the time that children spend relocating from one family to another. Some parents would only use this approach in the summer. Vacations are made easier by the two-week schedule.

Custody plans that make use of midweek transfers.

One parent will put in more hours throughout the first week. The other parent will put in more hours during the second week. By the end of the two weeks, the overall number of custody days for each parent is equal. There are various methods for equitably dividing the weeks. These figures represent the number of days that each parent will have. Parent One has children for three days, followed by Parent Two for four days. Parent Two only has three days whereas Parent One has four. It follows the equation 3-4-4-3. Then the schedules are reset.

 [3-4-4-3] 

This plan gives parents the same three days of the week in succession while rotating the fourth day. One parent might get time off from Monday through Wednesday. The other parent might only have time off from Friday through Sunday. Every so often, Thursday changes. Weekends are not switched in this plan unless you specifically desire to make a Saturday or Sunday the day that switches.

[5-2-2-5]

Alternate the entire weekend. It might be wise to try the 5-2-2-5 method. The same two days each week are allotted to each parent to spend with their child. Getting the schedules for Monday and Tuesday or Wednesday and Thursday. Weekends are alternated between the two parents.

[2-2-3]

The number of times your children visit each parent should be as regular as feasible, but not every day. Use the 2-2-3 custody plan as an option. While Parent One looks after the children for two of those days, Parent Two takes over the other two days of the week. Over the next three days, spend time with Parent One and the children. Next week’s plans have been switched around. Two days are given to Parent One, three days to Parent Two, and two days to Parent Two.

Children may find a week without one parent to be too long. Under these conditions, breaking up the week is a great idea. Over two weeks, these arrangements divide custody equally. This comprises regular working, weekend, and vacation schedules. This also holds for holidays and other notable occasions.

Can parents make changes to parenting time?

If both parents agree to change a certain parenting time plan, neither parent has to submit a motion. Both parents may ask the judge to approve a proposed order. In that case, a court hearing won’t take place until the judge orders one.

Ask your co-parent if they are okay with the change. You are not needed to submit anything to the court if the other parent consents to the alteration. Your existing arrangement provides reasonable parenting time. Your court order should already include your parenting time schedule. The judge must still accept any adjustments, even if the other parent is on board. An order based on a schedule is enforceable until the court issues a new one.

Put forth a Parenting Time Motion. If the other parent does not agree to the alteration you want, do this in your family law case. Parenting time must be reevaluated by the judge for good cause or due to a change in the facts. Different factors constitute a proper reason or change in circumstances. This will depend on the kind of change you are requesting. Request minor adjustments to parenting time. Unlike significant changes in custody, it is simpler.

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Goldman & Associates Law Firm is here to with information about Child Custody and Divorce in the State of Michigan.