People don’t normally think of divorce when they marry. Or maybe they do. Not in their first nor in their last one. It does make sense to learn a thing or two of how to go about it successfully if ever they do.
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There are a lot of different things good lawyers can tell you about how to have a successful divorce.
If there’s a single thing to remember, do remember this: have a vision of how you want your divorce to turn out.
Your vision of how your divorce should end up has to be front and center in the beginning of the case. It really impacts everything.
Envision this, you ultimately would want to have a working relationship with your ex regarding the kids. You would want to have a fluid relationship where if you need to take more time, and it’s her day, you’ll get it and vice versa.
Those are seeds you have to plant immediately as the divorce starts. Think about this. You are never gonna be able to pound your ex into the ground, and then after the divorce expect them to work with you on stuff. It’s not gonna work.
You need to already establish if that’s the end game you want. It must be established from the beginning. Develop a working relationship.
In a sense, you need to develop what will be the post divorce relationship while still in the throes of the divorce. And you know how to do it. There are some issues on which you can both agree. Certain things to disagree on.
If you do disagree on certain things, you do it in an appropriate and respectful manner. It’s less likely to result in the kind of presentation making it difficult for you to move on. Difficult for you to have a working relationship with your ex.
Your choice of lawyer is very important. When choosing your lawyer, make sure that you and your lawyer share a common vision. You have to agree on how the conclusion of divorce will look like.
For example, your vision is you want to be able to get along with your ex-husband. Your lawyer’s vision is to burn your soon-to-be ex to the ground. It’s not gonna work.
When the divorce is over and your lawyer is done burning, you still have a relationship with your ex until your kids are eighteen. You have to live with your ex, not literally but figuratively. You gotta work with him. You gotta still deal with him.
How are you gonna do that if the situation is completely destroyed by the conduct of your own lawyer? Be careful with the person you choose. Choose someone whose vision of the outcome of the case is the same as yours.
And how will you know?
It’s a discussion you should have right off the bat. Tell your lawyer the kind of relationship you want with your ex. You want things to look like this.
Ask your lawyer: Can you bring me to that place?
If the answer is yes? Great!
If the answer is no?
You move on. Get someone who can really help you achieve your goal.
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Goldman & Associates Law Firm is here to with information about Child Custody and Divorce in the State of Michigan.